By Lya Carrera
EDGE Entertainment Contributor
Published Web site: EDGE
Online Version Date: May 10, 2006
Online Version Printed Date: June 10, 2006

Although the gay marriage debate continues in Massachusetts, history was made in 2004 when same sex couples were allowed to apply for marriage applications and legally marry in the Bay State.

For openly gay and Maine native, Stephanie Higgins -who was present then - it was an emotional time.

“I personally broke down and cried [because getting married became] a possibility for me, whereas it wasn’t before,” she said. “It was a huge thing [because] I can get married and perhaps have a fantastic 33-year-old relationship like my parents.”

Higgins memorialized this event in a documentary she directed called The Gay Marriage Thing.

It follows one lesbian couple in their quest to get married in 2004 amidst the debates and protests. Interviews include two church leaders, a politician, and people on the street who are for and against gay marriage.

Her film is slated to be shown at the 22nd Annual Gay and Lesbian Film/Video Festival on May 21, 2006, at the Museum of Fine Arts.

Background

Higgins grew up in the small town of Gorham, Maine, about 20 minutes from Portland, Maine. She attended the University of New Hampshire where she majored in communications with a focus on general media theory.

“After I graduated from [UNH], I had this fantastic theoretical education, but I didn’t have much practical experience, so I felt that I needed to go to graduate school to get it; [that is] what I got at Emerson [College],” she said. “Emerson has a fantastic reputation for having lots of people in the industry and their network is amazing.”

And she may have made the right choice in attending Emerson. In 2000, she won an EVVY award - Emerson’s own student-run award show - for Best Graduate Project when she earned her master’s degree in Visual Media Arts.

At the same time while Higgins’ star was rising on the professional level, she began to sort out some issues on the personal level - her sexual orientation. She struggled with it for some time before acknowledging the reality of it.

“I spent a lot years denying these feeling and not being truthful with myself though there; was no pressure except [from] society and not seeing positive images of lesbians,” she said. “I was having stomach problems because I was stressed, but once I became comfortable and accepted myself, all those issues went away.”

Higgins says that writing helped her a lot with the transition, and even though her family - her parents and her younger brother and sister - were all supportive when she came out to them, it was her mother who was a major factor in helping her adjust.

“My mother was my life line,” she said. “She was the closest person [to me] and she saved my life because I was able to talk about it with her and deal with it even before I was accepting of [it] myself.”

Currently, Higgins is involved with someone who is not in the industry, and they have been together for about a year.

After Higgins graduated from Emerson, she freelanced for a while, but in the summer of 2003, she had another calling.

“I always dreamed of having my own production company and working with media, so it was time to go out on my own and start this company,” she said.

Higgins’ company called SassyMedia is based out of Belmont, Mass., and “The Gay Marriage Thing” is its first project.

The Documentary

The idea to do a documentary on gay marriage developed when she attended the Massachusetts Constitutional Conventions in 2004.

“I sat in the gallery surrounded by people of all colors, creeds, orientations, and ages, and listened to legislators debate [an issue] that affected me personally,” she said. “I was sad, angry, thankful, proud, awed, and inspired.

“Protests echoed through the halls [as people carried] signs [and wore] stickers,” she said. “You could walk down the hallway and look at someone’s sticker and label them either friend or foe based on their sticker. Occasionally, you would see people talking, but not that much and, of course, you can’t in that kind of environment where people are picketing and screaming.”

Higgins says that it was at that point that she became interested in exploring the people rather than event itself. In addition, she wanted to understand the opposition.

“I really wanted to find an argument that made sense to me, “she said. “I found that there were people who [felt strongly] about this issue and regardless of their words or [positions], there [were] emotions on both sides, and [all their feelings were] valid. The larger picture in this debate is how people are communicating or not communicating with each other.”

The next task at hand was getting the crew and interview subjects, but Higgins says it was not hard. She met them at the convention, through mutual colleagues, and by referrals.

It is interesting to note that Lorre Fritchy (Sandy ‘Spin’ Slade: Beyond Basketball) - who is the executive producer - also had another role in the documentary.

“She [Fritchy] is amazingly objective,” she said. “She can pull herself out of the story even [when] she is the story [along with her now spouse].”

Although Higgins is not religious, she is spiritual, and she sensed that something bigger was at work with her film.

“I do believe that things are meant to be [even] for this project,” she said. “Everything fell into place from [the interview subjects] to the storyline to the editing process; things came together in the way [that] it needed.”

Higgins thinks that her film is different from all the rest because her piece is an “un - documentary” and it is more “cinematic” in nature than journalistic.

“I really tried to focus on this one story about an American couple and how this issue affects them,” she said. “I did a little bit of journalism while at UNH, but I realized that it wasn’t my forte. I’m a filmmaker, so I wanted it to be more film-like [and I wanted] to layer it with not only the storyline [but also with] themes, graphics, photos, and music. [I wanted] to weave a story and not hit people over the head with statistics, events, or experts.”

She confesses that it wasn’t easy making this film; it was hard because she was interviewing some people who did not agree with her opinions or lifestyle.

“It’s hurtful when people tell you that you can’t get married because of who you are, so it was difficult, but 1 was able to put that aside and tell the story,” she said. “In the end, [it’s] a story that a whole family can watch together no matter the opinions and no matter if there are any gay individuals in the family or not.”

It’s Higgins’ intention to have her documentary assist in opening the lines of communication among people overall.

“The purpose of the film is start a conversation between a gay person and a family member who may have differing opinions on the subject,” she said. “I think people who are gay might be frustrated to learn that they’re not the main audience for this although they can certainly watch it and appreciate the story; it’s really for inciting a conversation between a mother and a son or a grandmother and a granddaughter in order to try to heal those differences, which is what we all struggle to do.”

The theme of communication along with love is what Higgins believes will help in “focusing on our commonalities and our humanity, [and not] our differences.”

And these themes could be reason why the public may be resonating with the film. The video - before it was even finished - was first shown in the summer of 2004 at the Boston Jewish Film Festival by their invitation. After it was completed in February 2005, it was later screened at the New Orleans Reel Identity Film Festival, Colorado’s Breckenridge Festival of Film, and the New England Film and Video Festival, just to name a few.

“Most people who’ve seen the video relate to some aspect of it whether they’re religious, gay, or straight,” Higgins said. “At the Breckenridge Festival, I actually had a little kid, about 10 or 11 years old, thank me for making the video. Who knows if he is or would be gay in the future, but it was sweet. I’ve also had a lot people come up to me and say, ‘I’m going watch this with my mom/ or ‘I’m going to watch this with my husband’s family because I have these arguments with them all the time.’”

It is clear by the reception at the festivals and by its demand that Higgins has made a positive impact among her viewers, and she thinks that it may help the gay marriage issue on a larger scale.

“I think the idea in this documentary can really change the discussion on gay marriage and move it toward feelings and away from points and counterpoints,” she said. “I think [that in order to make] headway in discussions, [the focal point needs to be on] feelings and [feelings of] not only your [own], but of your opposers [as well].”

The Future

Besides being shown at Boston’s Gay and Lesbian Film Festival, several churches in the area will also be screening it in the fall.
Also, earlier this year, Higgins signed on with the distributor, The Cinema Guild, so people can purchase a copy. Higgins says that even some schools have requested and purchased her film.

“Getting a distributor has been a blessing because its enabled me to start writing some scripts for feature length narratives,” she said. “I have a couple of things that I’m working in parallel right now [though] I’d rather not talk about the storyline because they’re in such infancy right now.”

Higgins says that she hopes to work with not only Fritchy again in the future but also work with individuals who “love storytelling and respect the power of the media,”

If you want more information on the dates of the church screenings, please connect to www.thegaymarriagething.com. or e-mail Higgins at info@thegaymarriagething.com.

The documentary is also available in DVD and VHS and can be purchased by calling 800-723-5522. Schools can purchase materials at cinemaguild.com.

Lya Carrera is currently interning at EDGE. She attended Wellesley College for undergraduate school and studied journalism at Emerson College. She can be reached at lcarrera30@aol.com.